ani

Jon, Rehearsal, and Essays
2004-12-21 @ 5:07 p.m.

I'm trying to write my english essays, but I just can't. I keep thinking about Jon. I just don't want to think about him anymore, but I can't help it. The sentencing was awful. There were a bunch of people there supporting Jon, but the things people said about him were just so awful. I don't understand the way some peoples minds work. I just don't get it. I felt guilty that I didn't make a statement in court, so afterwards I talked to reporters. I feel dumb. My mom also talked to them. We were on the news. At least they didn't misconstrue what I said at all. They said that some students supported him.
I just want this whole thing to be over with. I just don't want to have to deal with it anymore. I want it to be out of my head. I just want everything to be better. I want to go back to February 8 and make Jon not do it. OK. This is my last entry about this unless something really important happens. I just need to let go. I hope no one makes any negative comments to me about what I said. I just might have to punch them in the nose....
Aaaaaaanyway. I had rehearsal for OUAS after school today. We're doing this song from Newsies and it's really low. I got a sort of solo. It's like two lines. But whatever. Better than nothing. Though I'm pissed that some underclassmen have so much more than me. Stupid heads. I think all alto solos and small numbers should go to me, with some assistance from other people. Maybe.
I hate AP english. I'm dying. My bookbag is breaking my back just because of all the books Mr. T is giving out. He's dumb. And AP English should be easy. Like AP Euro. That's the easiest class ever.
Concert tonight. I'm not sure what I'm going to wear. I was thinking my red skirt, a long sleeve black shirt, and the high heels I wore to prom. I just want to practice walking in those again first. I wanted to out and get something new to wear, but I didn't have any time. I still have to go out and get everyone their gifts. I mean, it's not like I haven't thought about it. I have. I just haven't had the time. I just hope I can still get everything I need to. Hopefully tomorrow. otherwise, no presents for people. And you can blame it on Ben for making me work for him on thursday instead of wednesday. Not that I'd be able to work for him on wednesday, but I'd rather you blame him than me.
Ack. It's getting late. I have to finish writing the outlines of my essays to I can actually write them at the concert. Just don't tell my mommy.